Map your brilliance

Not IQ, but your ability to shine.

The clues to our brilliance lie in our stories. Hundreds of leaders in all walks of life have used this simple but searching exercise. Many have found significant moments suggesting rich insights and meaning for their personal and professional lives.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1. A pinch of curiosity and an ounce of openness to life. Go no further without these. An ability to laugh at oneself is also highly recommended.
2. One large sheet of paper and at least two pens of different colour.
3. Somewhere you would enjoy sitting, thinking, and maybe walking.
4. A minimum of two hours uninterrupted time — preferably a morning or afternoon.
5. One friend or colleague with whom you would welcome talking and who is also willing to do the exercise.

And here’s the basic process:

1. Map your significant moments.
2. Look for connections.
3. Walk and share what you saw.
4. Talk over the experience.
5. Journal the experience and insights.

I have done this exercise myself many times and led hundreds of people through it. You can get great value out of doing only Steps 1, 2, and 5. But the walk and talk in Steps 3 and 4 adds great depth. Okay, here are those steps in a bit more detail.

 1. Map your significant moments

Do this step on your own. Use a large sheet of paper (butcher’s paper or A3). Write small with a pen, not a marker. Write in small chunks, more like a map than a letter (see my diagram). Use just enough words to capture the moment. Arrange things in chronological order.

So what do you write?

You are after moments that stand out to you. Note: they must be events, not things you like. Making lists is a waste of time. For example: don’t write that you like fishing; think of a specific time you went fishing that’s significant to you. Yes, this is much harder to do.

Some moments may be ones you feel proud about. Or happy. Or amused. Some may be moments when others appreciated you. Look for events whose memory lifts your spirits. Yet some may be hard moments. I don’t want to send you into therapy, but sometimes our deepest changes came through hard moments. You are not looking to relive the pain, but to consider who you have become (in any ways for which you are glad).

2. Look for connections

Again, do this step on your own. When you feel you’ve got enough to work with, it’s time to stand back from the details and look for the connections. There are two parts to this step.

First, look for common elements in different moments. A childhood moment and a professional moment might reveal similar convictions, skills, or ways of thinking. That’s the kind of thing you’re looking for. Put an asterisk of the same colour on those moments and any others that feel similar. Use different colours for different themes. Some moments will fit two or more themes.

Second, name the themes. Don’t judge what comes to mind. Those first words are often intuitive. Write them down. When you’re ready, write a single sentence for each theme. I use sentences like these: ‘I am one who …’ or ‘I am a … who …’. Make your words strong and true. Each sentence is the beginning of naming some aspect of your brilliance.

3. Walk and share what you saw

Arrange a time and place to meet someone you trust who also did Steps 1 and 2. I can’t stress too much how walking enriches this whole process. If the weather is bad, find somewhere to sit and look in the same direction, just like you were walking. But this is not a conversation. Walk in one direction for half the time. One person talks; the other listens. Yes, only listens. Turn, swap roles, and repeat.

4. Talk over the experience

Find a comfortable place, grab a drink, and let the conversation go wherever it feels comfortable and helpful.

5. Journal what you see

Do this step on your own. In light of Steps 3 and 4, revisit how you named your themes. These are glimpses of your brilliance: make each sentence strong and true. The whole idea is to help you bring your best to others. It’s not about putting yourself into a box.

If you are doing the exercise with a group…

1. No-one should feel forced to do any part of this exercise.
2. No-one should feel forced to talk with anyone.
3. No-one should share more than they feel good about sharing.
4. No-one should repeat what someone told them without permission.
5. Include a group debrief. What was it like mapping your moments? Finding themes? Telling your story? Listening? Being listened to? People might also just want to be quiet.

Finally, I have used this exercise countless times as part of a retreat with Board, Executive and leadership teams who want to work better with each other — more robustly, honestly, insightfully — to lead innovation and change. I won’t say there’s always been a breakthrough; but it’s been rare when there hasn’t been one.

What moments you mapped from your life feel like they need you to pay attention to them?

What insight has begun to form for you?

How can you open the space for others to discover their brilliance in ways they would welcome?

COMMENTS: Unfortunately I have had to turn off comments because of automated trolls filling the pages with random spurious text messages. My apologies. For those who want to interact, please email me at mark(at)markstrom(dot)co.